Dustin Hannon

Dustin Hannon met Jesus face to face on October 28, 2018.

“This is a story I personally wrote. I stand up here to give this story of how drugs and chemical abuse can affect the person doing them and the loved ones around them. I am going to start by saying addiction begins with the hope that something out there can instantly fill up the emptiness inside, therefore an example is it’s like a curse and until it is broken, its victim will perpetually remain in the shackles of bo Fage. I had someone in my life who was a drug addict and with it, it made him forget about what was important and worthwhile in life, such as family, career, finance, and social relationships.
If you knew my brother, then you know, but for those of you who don’t, start by thinking of the movie “Love and Basketball”. Since the time he was 3 years old, he tagged along with my oldest brother Chet to basketball practice and being a normal 3-year-old, he went to get one of the balls, and to everyone’s surprise, he dribbled it about 100 times from one end of the court to the other. As he grew in age so did his love for the game, that love turned into a deep passion and an unmatched dedication to be the best he could be. He never dreamed that there would be an “end of the tunnel” in his basketball career other than running out onto the court until May 3rd, 2015. His life had changed forever due to a horrible car accident that left him with broken bones from his neck all the way down to his back and a broken pelvis. The possibility of him having children or walking again was slim. After numerous surgeries and some metal holding him together, he was able to walk away with a long road of recovery ahead. The physical pain mixed with the pills he had to swallow made him sleep constantly. However, the hardest pill he had to swallow was that the entire future he dreamed of was over in the blink of an eye. The physical, mental, and emotional pain made him lose the light of life in his eyes, the motivation and confidence to go out and do anything was gone. That was until he found a drug that took all the pain away and gave him the energy to run a marathon for days on end without a single water break. Sounds amazing right? NO. That is when the bad storms had begun. I was about 16 or so and that is the time of your life when you should begin to experience life in my opinion but no not me, I was sleeping in the floor of my mom and dad’s bedroom floor due to the fact of not knowing what my brother was going to do the mood he was going to be in or what was going to happen. I should not have had to live in fear but I did that for him because he was my brother and he could not help what he was doing he couldn’t control it because it had just taken over him and the sad thing Is at times I do not think he knew of the things he did or half of the things he may have said to all of us either. Coming home from school with broken glass, to broken objects, to him throwing all of his belongings in his car and going to blow it up, and then throwing an axe at the window because he was having a spell. I will never forget the time he was doing this. I was hiding in the bathroom with the fan on in my mom and dad’s bathroom because I was so scared that the outcomes of this situation was not going to turn out so well, I got up and something was telling me you need to go out there and talk to him after my parents telling me not to I did not listen of course he was fast pacing himself back in forth from his room to outside well he was coming up to me and as scared as I was of what he may say or quick for him to flip another switch, I pushed him and said Dustin please stop and look at me in my eyes and listen to what I have to say please I told him that this was not worth it and that he was someone I had nothing but the most care and love for in this world and that I looked up to him he was my role model for what reasons then I did not know but he did he meant everything to me and he looked at me and said there is no reason for me to be your role model and he said I love you kk but nothing you say or do is going to help me I am lost, broken, shattered and I’m gone are the exact words he told me and after that day I felt like I failed as a sister. I thought as a whole as a family we had given and told him how much he was appreciated and loved but nothing is ever good enough for the addict. After a year or so he went to rehab and let me tell you that was a God send for him. He was the brother I had known before this and we were so happy. We went to the family weekend there and we had the opportunity to say everything we wanted to. We told him all of the things he had done to hurt everyone in our family and while he sat in the chair sitting in front of us all he was crying and beating himself up because he did not know how much control the drugs had taken on him. After he got out of rehab, he did good for a month or so, and then boom he spiraled back down and became the monster he was before. To this day I have people telling me that I did all I could for him and that nothing, nothing at all in this world was going to help him you know why because if they don’t want to help themselves there is no saving them. But the point is to show people out there that in this world is all it takes is the desire to want to help yourself and want to do better and sometimes all you need is someone who you do not know from the man in the moon to talk to because who can sit there with someone you love or know and tell them your background without them judging or telling stuff that you want to hear not the critical feedback you could get back from someone you have no idea who it is. I just want everyone to know I loved him through it all and my opinion on him till this day will never change because I knew he really was and I knew deep down inside he was fighting a battle that couldn’t be saved and then my heart shattered on October 28th 2018 and I have felt no more than a failure since then because what did I not say or what did I say for him to leave this world. The only thing that helps me today with grieving through this is that he is in a better place where he is no longer hurting himself or others even though I think I would be okay if he was still here doing those things because I sometimes just miss those smiles or talks, we had about life and him always checking on me no matter the circumstances. This is just a piece of my story on how going through depression, and drugs, can affect the world around you. I just want everyone to know the only thing depression and drugs or whatever it may be is that it only stops the pain you are witnessing and takes control over your life. It does not help the people who love you. Also nobody will ever tell me that having siblings aren’t the greatest gift ever because I would go over and beyond for any of my brothers and I hope they know that because with all honesty I am perpetually torn between “I can’t live with them” and “I can’t live without them”” Love, Your sister Caitlin

We can’t wait until our reunion in heaven.

Until then…

You are loved, Dustin Hannon, and never forgotten.